Sunday, March 27, 2011

Rewind

I'm feeling really low right now. I feel like since high school I have just been a cesspool of mistakes. I have pictures of my graduation day on the wall and I see the photos of me at our old house with my healthy dad, and not owing anybody anything. Since that day I have continuously screwed up my life. The mistakes are unbelievable. I know, I know...we all make mistakes, but I have made so, so, so many. I'm tired of struggling. I'm tired of not being able to afford my medicine. I'm sick of being in a house where there are times when we don't have enough money to go buy a gallon of milk. I'm sick of my phone ringing from people wanting money from me that I don't have. I'm exhausted by lenders and creditors harassing me and threatening me. I hate my credit score, I hate that I am still in school at 24 having not gotten even one degree. I hate myself sometimes for the mess I put myself into. Some of it wasn't my fault, but I'm still taking the fall for mistakes others made in addition to my own. I feel lazy and irresponsible. I hate this life and want a second chance to make it all right.

1 comment:

  1. I wish I would have read this sooner. Sometimes we allow ourselves to be consumed by all that is most negative in our lives. Keep in mind that no matter how severe or bad you feel your situation is, there is someone out there far worse off then you. Try to do at least one thing positive for yourself and oneother everyday. Don't gone beyond your means in doing so, but just as you can. Keep in mind that if on any given day you can't, you can't. Most importantly, whatever it is you do, give it 100% as there is no more. No 110, 115, or 120%. You give 100% or you just don't. I hope things are better for you as I write this comment and that you and yours are enjoying summer thus far. Do stop by if even to say hi and let me know how things are goin. Take care and hope to be readin' another more positive post soon. All My Best.

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